Father’s Day has come and gone (until next year) 

Vendors went through the usual seasonal sales drive, ensuring that ample gift packages stocked the shelves for those looking to treat their fathers (or the men in their lives) on this special occasion.

Church leaders said special prayers for fathers, and did all the socially correct things expected on this day. Still, the overall effect did not match up to that of Mother’s Day. Some fathers would tell you that it was just another day for them because their children didn’t give them the attention similar to that of Mother’s Day.

Why this partiality? Is it because the ‘Single Mom Syndrome’ is so acute? Maybe.

Men, in general have been getting a bad rap lately, and not totally without merit. When one hears about an adult male having inappropriate relations with an underage female, we ask ourselves how would he feel if someone did that to his daughter. But we turn around and hear that men are doing the same to their very own daughters. And so the collective image of men drops even lower on the appreciation scale.

Yet we have to take things in perspective and remember that even though a proportionate number of fathers may not be living up to fatherhood expectations, there are still exceptional role model fathers and we should be grateful that not all men are of the worse sort.

Caribbean fathers, and Virgin Islands fathers in particular need all the encouragement they can get to maintain a grip on sharing the responsibility of raising our children, in our societies. The fathers of the Territory, particularly the older generation, have been excellent fathers, looking out for their children’s welfare, whether born in or out of wedlock. This is a tradition that young males in the Territory should endeavour to continue. Today, there are too many fathers in the Territory shirking their responsibility because they and their children’s mothers are no longer rocking it together.

A son or daughter didn’t choose their parents, and can’t be responsible for the circumstances of his or her birth. Fathers are equally important in ensuring that a child reaches his or her full potential after God gives the breath of life and eyes are open to this world. Once a man has sired (check that fine English word) a child, he should overcome whatever hang-ups he may have and do the daddy thing. So whether the mother is local or from some other country, the father should be a part of the child’s life in a positive way. And fathers should fight for this right if they have to, for in some cases mothers can be problematic too.

Still, children naturally tend to stick with their mothers. A father shouldn’t be seen as just a money machine like the ATMs at Scotiabank or FirstCaribbean. On the other hand, fathers shouldn’t have to be shuttled off to Her Majesty’s Prison for child-support neither.

Then there’s the other side of the story. A dutiful father becomes old and has to depend on his children. What sometimes happen is shameful to talk about. People, THIS IS NOT GOOD.

The Bible tells us to honor our fathers and our mothers so our days may be long upon the earth. Think about it. Honouring them simply means staying in touch and attending to their needs. The spiritual blessings; the wisdom, knowledge and understanding that comes from this, is priceless; beyond the value of any property one can hope to inherit.

I’m grateful for all the good fathers who cherish their roles as responsible adult men. Society needs good fathers. It’s a little late to say Happy Father’s Day. But I’ll say this: Keep up the good work, you are valuable, and when you think your children are taking you for granted, don’t hesitate to tell them to count their blessings.

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Copyright © 2008 by CMS Literary Services

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